Monday, December 1, 2008

One Down, One to go

So Thanksgiving is over. One Holiday down, one to go. It was almost like it wasn't Thanksgiving. We traveled to the eastern side of the state to spend the weekend with Todd's family. His grandmother had to move to a nursing home, so we spent some time helping clean out her apartment. It was weird going through her stuff, but we knew it would be easier for her not to be there. I felt really bad for Todd's grandma, it must have been hard knowing we were going through her life.
I did better than I thought I would. One of Todd's cousins had a baby girl in June. Her family was there, and because they live in Texas, this is the first time we have seen her baby. It made me sad on Thanksgiving day, I couldn't quit thinking that I should have been pregnant and due to have my own baby in just a few short weeks. I held it together, and didn't breakdown until after we left that evening. I feel bad, I didn't pay much attention to their baby or talk about her much, I just was trying to hold it together.
Thanksgiving is always a time for me to reflect what I am thankful for. I am extremely thankful for my daughter, husband, and the rest of my family. I am also thankful we all have good health. But this year I had a hard time convincing myself to be thankful, selfish yes, but it is what it is. I really am thankful this shitty year is almost over.

I thought about you alot this past couple of weeks Will. Your ornament came, it is beautiful. I am anxiously awaiting the arrival of your memory bracelet. I hope you know your daddy and I love you and think about you often.

1 comment:

Never forgetting Gregory said...

Don't feel bad for not paying attention to the baby. You were very strong to hold it together, and that is all anyone can ask. It must have been so tough. Hugs.